Monday, May 02, 2011

Balance


Balance.  It's something I've been struggling and fighting with myself over lately.

In some respects, I'm very lucky.  I have a job that allows me flexible hours, including working at home two days a week.  I have a hubby who has a variety of interests so that he's not waiting around, nor complaining, while I'm out doing my training.  I don't have kids.  I don't do yard work, and truthfully I'm a bare minimum housework kind of gal.   (I'm working on that one.)

The scales I'm having trouble with lately are more philosophical.  It's an issue of seriousness.  No, I don't mean it's a serious issue.  I mean it's an issue of how serious do I take myself.  Am I not taking myself seriously enough?  Too serious?

I know that my coworkers occasionally (okay....routinely) think that I'm overboard already.  Training 6 days a week?  Sometimes twice a day?  Crazy talk.

I also know that I'm not doing as much as a lot of triathletes out there.  And I'm not talking about professionals.  Recreational triathletes like me.  Workouts, equipment, dietary supplements, dietary restrictions, recovery garments/concoctions.  The options are mind boggling.  And overwhelming.

And I have to admit, often I read or hear something that is written for athletes, and my first thought is..."They're talking to pros, not me.  I'm not an athlete. I'm a SAS programmer."  When I hear athlete, I think professional.   I'd say I'm a weekend warrior, but I'm warrior-ing all week long, so I'm not sure that's appropriate either.

I didn't buy a tri bike for the longest time mostly because I felt like tri bikes were for real athletes.  I didn't want to be riding a tri bike, with aero wheels, and getting passed by everyone on the course.    I'm not competitive enough to ride "that" bike.  And I'm still not.  I finally just decided that it would be a fun toy, and life is too short to put off buying fun toys if you can afford it.  So when I got my bonus this year, I got myself a toy.

But I still struggle with seriousness.  If I turn something down because I have an event the next day, or that weekend,  I wonder if I'm taking myself too seriously.  But then I think that if I'm investing so much of my time, why am I not taking myself more seriously?

I want to lose those last 3-5 pounds that are just clinging to me, but I also want to eat that little piece of chocolate. Or that piece of bacon.  Mmm....bacon.  Balance.

I want to go on vacation without worrying about workouts.  But I want to do well in my events too.  Balance.

I want to workout hard, but don't want to get injured.  I want to get my work projects done, but not be a slave to my job.  I want to......  The list could go on and on, but you get the picture.  It's all about balance.

It's a fine line.  One that I'm still working on walking.

3 comments:

Molly said...

oooh bacon (must avert eyes from thoughts of chocolate). I hear you - I think these are common concerns for the amateur athlete. We know we aren't gonna win anything but always wonder if that little bit of extra we do might give us an edge.

Jo Lynn said...

Personally, I think you take yourself too seriously.
I wish you could do whatever you (I) want to do, whenever you (I) want to do it. I think you miss out on a lot.
You know I love you, I'm just sayin'. ;)

B.o.B. said...

We are totally on the same page here! It's tought to not take it too seriously, but at the same time we want to excel. I'll just go ahead and walk the line with you. LOL!